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Random Musings
An attempt at a freeform poem. 
24th-Feb-2010 09:18 pm
Avon's thoughts, right before Star One and his blow up at Blake.


Avon's Anger

I had a life
now I have none.
Only a ship
Stolen
From my grasp
A promise
To myself
Still waiting.

Dragged
Manipulated
With idiots
Led by a fool.

The instinct
to save
also works
with
a man
who does not think.
Can't think.
Irritating
pulling him back
endlessly.
Can't let him die.
Again
and again.
Damned instinct.

Betrayed by a master
pushed to obey
anger seethes
in me
I plan
ready
the refuge
wait for my time
and for yours to end
I am waiting

One more death will do it
I will take control

Your brand of arrogance
and idiocy
no longer amuses
it fills me
with anger
and hatred
a desire
to see you
no more.

Can't let him die.
But
now
don't want him to live
near me.
His face
fills me
with hate.

He sees this
finally.
How I
detest him.
No illusions
between us
Only parting
Only relief.

Insane dreams
Pointless
Blood
And violence
A fanatic
wading
in a sea of red.
I am drowning
in sickness,
in a disease
named Blake.

I had a life
now I have none
I am determined
to reclaim it
to tear it
from the grasp
of a madman
masking as
an honest man
I will live again
be happy again
to escape
this life of
darkness and endless violence
lies that never end
a bully masquerading
as a friend
used for
his political end

I will be
finally free.
Avon Angry
Comments 
26th-Feb-2010 01:17 am (UTC)
Fortunately for me, dialogue is very easy. It's details that are hardest for me. Avon in my head sounds just like in the series. The characters are so strongly established in my head that they almost take on a life of their own. They almost do their own dialogue and carry on conversations, either with me or with each other. It makes it very easy for me as a writer ;) I develop the scene, drop them in it and let them navigate the scene by themselves.
As for my explanation of what happened in the last scene...very long winded, sorry =)
The sequence went like this...yes, I am anal and have studied this scene in detail in preparation for writing ;)
- Avon enters and finds Blake's people trying to kill Tarrant, Soolin shoots the technician and saves Tarrant
- Tarrant tells Avon that Blake is there (Avon and Vila look at each other)
- Klynn, the female that Tarrant had knocked out earlier, comes to and calls for the guards
- Avon shoots her because she is a threat and she is too far for them to stop before she can call for more help
- Blake comes in with an armed Arlen, who points her gun at them the entire time
- Avon points his gun at Blake
- Tarrant tells them that Blake betrayed them all, including Avon
- at this point, after Tarrant tells them that Blake has betrayed him, Avon is still acting like a friend by pointing his gun down and away from Blake before asking if it is true (Avon is one of several chances that Avon gives Blake to answer and redeem himself)
- Blake's brilliant response is that, "It's me, Blake."

Well, that's just brilliant, Blake. Because given your track record, you have just admitted that you have betrayed Avon. Like all the other times Blake has betrayed Avon's trust and that of his crew. This man is so incredibly arrogant that one declaration that he's Blake must instantly make everyone accept what he does without explanation?

One other thing to note, this is the kind of dominance tactic Blake has practiced on Avon before. When Avon asks a question, he wants enough information so that he can decide for himself. Blake ignores his question and orders Avon around without explanations. What he is doing is expressing his dominance. He wants Avon to follow him just because he is Blake and orders him to. He does not want Avon to follow because it is Avon's decision based on information Avon has analyzed by himself. But Blake makes a big error here (what else is new?). He doesn't realize Avon is not the same man as before. If Blake doesn't answer his questions, Avon doesn't just get angry but do what he says. If Blake doesn't answer Avon's questions, there are deadly consequences.

Avon killed Blake because Blake was an arrogant moron who did not respect anyone else except himself or he would have answered Avon's real concerns. Either that or Blake was completely insane. How difficult is it to answer, yes or no?

- Blake moves towards Avon and Avon orders him to stand still and Blake does. Avon asks again if Blake has betrayed him (this is the 2nd chance Avon has given him).

Only a blind man or an idiot would not realize that Avon doesn't believe him and looks hurt. It's written clearly on his face. Some may say Avon should have read Blake's body language and realized what Blake's obscure answer meant. Well, what is Blake's excuse? Avon's language is clear in his words and on his face.
- Blake says that Tarrant doesn't understand (which makes Blake as much of a moron, even more now, than he was before). Of course Tarrant doesn't understand. He never understood Blake was a fool who liked to play games with other people's lives when it suited his goals. He should have asked Avon or Deva.
- Avon is hurt and says he doesn't understand.

(Poor Avon. I do believe he did love the bastard, just a little bit. And after Anna and Tynus's betrayal, and Blake's constant betrayals, Avon loses it.)

And what doesn't Avon understand? Hmm...how about Blake's people trying to kill his injured pilot?
And consider this. My guess is that every one of Blake's people they've come across have tried to attack Avon, just like they tried to attack Tarrant. Why do I say this? Because Avon didn't enter the complex with the long gun. He had to have obtained it in the base.
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