The entire department was infected by the Useful Virus today. It appears that it rewrote all menu items, on all applications so that the only ones available were:
Read Manager's Mind...........CtRl+Alt+P...(Blank screen of death results after a banshee like scream.) Adjust Manager's Attitude.....Ctrl+I.............(Instantly redirects to listing of appropriate penal colonies.) Enhance Salary......................Ctrl+S (Removes random amount of money from random idiot managers' accounts and deposits it...somewhere else.)
Of course, as I was unavailable, it took the entire day to remove the virus, during which very no useful work was done.
As for menu item #3, no one has been able to track down where the money was redirected to. It is unlikely that they will ever get it back.
Fortunately Unfortunately, I have an alibi was unable to render any assistance. I was still in the medical rehab centre for excessive back pain caused by idiot-manager-induced stress. Regrettable, but I am happy to report that I'm feeling much better now.
Congratulations Note to self: It's an outrage. I have no idea who would do such a thing. That is my official position.